Five Things I’ll Never Buy for My Future Kids
Posted by Cap in Stop Buying Crap! |As I was stuck in traffic on a fine 4th of July Friday, I noticed that the minivan in front of me had a gigantic LCD TV installed for their kids viewing pleasure. Before I knew it, I was tailgating the minivan to catch the ending to another fine episode of Sponge Bob SquarePants.
The problem with buying lots of crap for your kids is that you may be unintentionally giving your children a sense of entitlement. Being a former brat, I know how it is to annoy surrounding adults with the wanting, whining, and complaining.
From my experiences, the quickest way to raise a bratty child is to buy them lots of crap to appease them, and what better way than a gigantic TV in the car, with a full collection of Sponge Bob DVD?
Here’s a list of five things I’ll never buy for my future kids:
1) TV in the family car.
I’m not about to spoil my kids with hours of entertainment as we drive cross-country to visit grandma (because daddy was too ‘frugal’ to waste money on plane tickets). What my kids will get are important stories on life and personal development. “Why, just a decade ago, daddy had to wake up midmorning, walk all the way to his home office, and slave away on blogs and other web projects…”
2) $20,000 playhouse.
If daddy didn’t get one, you don’t get one too.
[From The Digerati Life].
3) Massively Multilayer Online Role-Playing Games
Are you kidding me? Just look at uncle James, who’s been playing World of Warcraft since 2004 and you’ll see why.
4) A brand new car.
Now, daddy’s not a cheap bastard like mommy’s new boyfriend. See here, a 1985 Toyota Corolla — Japanese engineering at its finest!
5) 6th Generation iPhone
My kid’s phone will be able to do three things: 1) Call mom. 2) Call dad. 3) Call 911.
30 Comments to “Five Things I’ll Never Buy for My Future Kids”
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July 5th, 2008 at 6:11 pm
I’ll go you one better. I’m not buying mine ANY car. I had to work to buy my first car AND the insurance. Any crotch-fruit of mine will have to do the same. And they’ll STILL be subject to me taking the keys away.
And no video game consoles either. Unless they can pay for it themselves. And since it’ll be using my electricity, I have the right to turn THAT off too.
get outside and play, and god help you if you get into trouble.
Kids have TOO much crap now, between gifts that come piling in, and the junk parents buy them. They have TOO MANY options. Seriously, how much of that junk goes unused. they find one or two things they like, the rest gathers dust (and loses parts).
Couple of tonkas, a baseball mitt, a bike and some crayons is all they need, dammit.
July 5th, 2008 at 8:24 pm
Two things–
1.) Never say never–especially when it comes to kids!
My BIL used to make fun of how we raised our kids and now that he’s got little ones, payback is sweet.
2.) Hold fast to these values. I do agree with them!
I have 3 kids–9,11,13yo and they don’t have any of these things, not even a cell phone never mind the latest version. That car thing though is going to bite me real soon though–here you can get your permit at 14!
July 6th, 2008 at 2:16 pm
Never say never! I was not raised with any of those things and never thought I would buy them for my kids either. BUT, now that I have spirited (read high energy, talkative, intelligent, strong willed, very little napping/sleeping, etc.) TWINS who did not sleep in the car as infants and still do not at 4 years old sleep in the car on road trips, the portable DVD player comes in handy. As it is I only see my family about once a year because the trip is grueling even with the DVD player. I nearly drove straight into a semi truck when I did not have some sort of respite from their constant questions, whining, talking, fighting, etc. of my twin girls. There are many days I beg for them to sit and watch a DVD at home (no cable) just so i can have some peace for 30 minutes. You might surprise yourself when you do become a parent. I thought babysitting all my life would prepare me but nothing can. Good luck!
July 6th, 2008 at 4:13 pm
I have two kids, one just turned 18 the other is 10. We refuse to do movies in the car. This is family time and yes we do road trips and yes it can get tiring but we use this time to sing, play games, and just hang with each other.
We have a car for my 18 to use, not own, and it is a solid hand me down. In return she has to help get her brother etc and attend college.
We have a Wii, and my son has a psp and game boy. BUT he is not allowed to play it 24/7 and in fact earns money by helping around the house and earns play time. It has saved my sanity, because he is ALL little boy and when I need to take him somewhere he is so happy to have some gameboy time that he is quite content.
Twins are tough, though!
July 6th, 2008 at 5:31 pm
I hate the TV’s in cars, I find them very distracting. Kids also need to develop self-talk skills, which they learn by entertaining themselves, and should not have electronic stimulation 24/7. I teach, and there is a big difference between students who have the plug-in babysitters, and those that don’t.
I didn’t truly own my first car until I was 25, and I was proud I had saved up my money to buy it. Kids will also treat things better if they have to help, or fully, purchase it.
July 7th, 2008 at 5:34 am
The theoretical mother of your imaginary kids already has a new boyfriend? Dare to dream, Cap.
July 7th, 2008 at 6:38 am
I say you will have a TV in the car, because you were likely not strapped into a movement restrictive car seat for long trips. I remember moving freely about the car. Front seat, back seat, Lying down, then up, then down. Wherever I wanted to be (within reasonable restrictions from my parents). When you strap down a toddler that doesn’t sleep. You can still have rules like you do for the TV in the house.
July 7th, 2008 at 9:01 am
Both my kids were strapped down in car seats as toddlers and we did road trips. I am not saying it is easy, but it is doable. Plus now both my kids have great imaginations and are very comfortable with having to entertain themselves.
Different strokes for different folks I guess, but I don’t regret not having a tv in the car or in anyone’s bedroom.
July 7th, 2008 at 5:39 pm
I always told my daughter,if I didn’t have ,she won’t.But she earned the money for her first pickup.But then she burnt the motor up,not checking the oil,which her Dad taught her to do.
Kids now have no chance to use their imagination,so sad….
July 8th, 2008 at 9:02 am
Kids are too clumsy for most of that stuff anyway. Have you ever watched one for an extended period of time? Curiosity, carelessness and lack of control makes them break almost everything.
That being said, I wouldn’t mind having that playhouse as a summer home. ;)
July 8th, 2008 at 11:01 am
We don’t have any of those things. We use the money to keep them involved in community sports and other classes instead. If you keep them busy enough they won’t have time to want all of these other things to keep them busy.
July 9th, 2008 at 12:25 pm
I can’t believe anyone spends $20k on a play house!
July 11th, 2008 at 9:50 pm
I thought I would never want those things for my boys either. But I agree with a lot of moms above that it is impossible to keep kids strapped down in a car. I don’t have a car TV, but they do have games. Some research suggests that kids that play these games (not endlessly, mine do have time limits) develop above-average hand/eye coordination and problem-solving skills that make them better suited for careers such as surgeons, engineers etc. My 8 year old is very smart, and is already a techie. I am confident he will be able to compete in this high-tech world when he gets older. Especially against kids from other countries like Japan & China whose kids already outshine ours in education. I want them to have the edge.
By the way, my dad worked for IBM in the 80’s. I had my first car (new) at 17, and I had one of the first IBM computers (with the monochrome amber screens) in my college dorm in 1988. I asked for neither. I did not grow up spoiled or unappreciative. I realized how much my parents loved me and sacrificed to work hard to give my brother and me what they did not have. And I will do the same for my children.
You can give them all you want. It is how you raise your children that makes the difference. Teach them respect, understanding, compassion, and balance it with reading, creating, etc. Just be there for them. And you will have little problems.
July 15th, 2008 at 3:59 pm
I was the world’s greatest parent…then I had kids. We too were adamant that we would never buy a van with a DVD player but after five 2000+ mile road trips with three kids under age 10 it no longer seems like something that would ruin them for life.
All things in moderation.
July 15th, 2008 at 7:57 pm
Car TV’s are ridiculous, especially during long road-trips. Think of all the scenery going by, the sights you will miss.
Yes, it gets boring when the sights spiral into monotony…but if I was bored, my kids will be bored, too;)
July 16th, 2008 at 3:51 am
I’m afraid I will also be a voice of dissent and okay the in-car DVD player. Yes, they will be zombies for the time being but you won’t have to try and discipline them will driving with the other hand.
Of course, the point is moot for me since you’d need to have an SUV/Minivan to get one, and one thing on MY list that many people (unless they have a large household and/or 3+ kids) don’t need is an SUV/Minivan. Look in Europe and Asia, the biggest thing they have is a stationwagon. Fuel- and cost- efficient!
July 23rd, 2008 at 11:07 am
Love that your imaginary kids’ imaginary mommy has a new boyfriend already. You’ll have to show this post to your future wife someday :) We have an almost-3-month old baby boy. Our trick to avoiding all the baby crap has been to just NOT GO SHOPPING. We haven’t been in Babies R Us, or Target’s baby section, or anywhere else where we might see piles of crap for babies. We have one old-as-dirt tv, which my husband uses to watch PBS, the History channel, and Discovery. He never turns it on until late evening, so our son is not going to be exposed to tv commercials – not for a long time anyway.
There will be no TV in the car.
Large cardboard boxes make great playhouses. So do sheets draped over living room furniture.
We have a Nintendo 64 with MarioKarts. That’s it for video games. Since we haven’t updated our game system since the mid 90’s, I doubt we’ll be doing so anytime soon.
We will strongly encourage our son to not buy a car until after he graduates from college. We live in an urban area, there is no need for a car here. And I remember from my days in college that the people who did have cars just had to pay big bucks for parking permits, and then circle the lots for ages looking for a spot, while those of us on bikes and Rollerblades just cruised up to our classrooms and went right in. Either way, we will not be paying for a car, gas, or insurance on his vehicle if he chooses to buy one.
Great post – and I’m sure you’ll end up with great kids, despite their mommy’s cheap-ass boyfriend :)
July 24th, 2008 at 6:09 am
Am I the only commenter who doesn’t want to make bold statements about what I will or won’t do when I’m a parent of kids or teens?
I agree with the veterans who have raised or ARE currently raising teenagers and say to never say never, even though these five things are something I agree with.
July 25th, 2008 at 8:48 am
My kids are now in their 20s and 30s. We took frequent road trips when they were young and never had a TV, a DVD player or even a CD player to entertain them. They did bring books to read when it got really boring, but much time was spent playing games with license plates we came across, or talking about signs and the countryside or city. When they were too young to do that, they slept a lot.
My youngest daughter and nephew built their own tree house.. that’s as close as they came to a playhouse (excepting the occasional large cardboard box).
Kids get way too much stuff and way too little real life any more.
August 11th, 2008 at 9:16 am
dear lord I wish someone would buy me a mid-80’s corolla. Those things are so expensive since drifting became a sport. Extremely dangerous of course, but hopefully a kid who gets his hands on that car won’t know it, haha
August 11th, 2008 at 9:17 am
I bet uncle James from #3 has saved a fortune on entertainment expenses. Get him away from warcraft and watch his own personal credit crisis begin!
August 11th, 2008 at 9:18 am
There has to be something wrong with some of you, if every parent had the the “if i didnt have it, my kids wont either” mentality, you would churning butter with the amish and plowing your corn field instead of posting here.
Parents should want more for thier kids, to give them things they didnt have.
I had everything i could have possibly wanted when i was a kid N64, Gameboy, new computers, etc.. and yet somehow turned out a half decent person
the way your kids will turn out has everything to do with how you raise them, not what you buy them. little Timmy’s PS3 isnt going to turn him into a degenerate.
August 11th, 2008 at 12:41 pm
Although I will not be buying my children any of the items listed above, I belive that it is a lack of parenting that ruin children, not the things you buy them.
August 11th, 2008 at 1:25 pm
Just FYI for those that aren’t regular readers of the blog, yes, I do agree that for majority of cases, the values you impart on your children will go much further than anything you buy or won’t buy for them.
It was just a blog post for fun. I wouldn’t read into it too much.
August 21st, 2008 at 7:37 am
Buying lots of crap for your kids won’t exactly turn them into degenerates, but they’ll keep wanting more. You have to draw the line somewhere.
P.S. Im 16, and I have no Console or handheld gaming ystems, I have a computer, a stereo, and a keyboard. I almost didn’t have a computer, because every computer I had died. (NOT MY FAULT)
August 24th, 2008 at 8:21 pm
ha I wouldn’t mind that house :)
September 12th, 2008 at 10:41 am
I played Rock Band once and realized I wanted to learn the real guitar. He11 no, I did not go buy the game! I borrowed my mom’s guitar.
I agree w/ FrugalBabe, sheets and cardboard boxes make the best forts. I’m also jealous you have the N64! We lost it in hurricane k, and I miss mario kart! we had 3 games to that console, and once those flooded, that was the death to gaming for me. :-)
Anonymous is also right–if everyone gave their kids the childhood they had, we’d all be churning butter w/ amish and wouldn’t be posting annoying comments on a blog! haha! too funny.
In my childhood, if we whined as kids in the van on road trips, we got smacked. We went back to our coloring books/puzzle games and were happy kids! Yes, this was before the days of being politically correct.
Hasn’t anyone seen the South Park ADD treatment? :-D
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oPZ_5qMr-ds
January 8th, 2009 at 8:22 am
I was a fantastic parent……until I actually became one.
Of course it’s easy to idealize how you’ll parent before you’re one. Believe me, I have 14, yes 14 nieces and nephews and thought I had many answers. Two boys later, I read your comment on cross-country trips in the car & had to laugh out loud. You’ve obviously never driven ANYWHERE with two toddler boys for longer than two hours at a stretch.
I do agree with the other four, however & in general, think kids have excessive amounts of stuff. When my sister got my son a Star Wars huge clubhouse (the kind that goes indoors, made w/ ripstop nylon & those plastic support thingys) and his friends still make forts from our sheets & lawn chairs. I had very little growing up & ended up becoming a creative director. I had my imagination & that’s what I want to give my sons….except on car trips longer than 2 hrs!!!
Best of luck to you when you do become a parent! I enjoy your blog!
December 4th, 2009 at 4:11 pm
This is pretty hilarious. I honor the intention, and would suggest that you keep a copy and see how it pans out in reality. We don’t have any of this stuff – but we do have reasonable facsimiles of some of them (remember GameBoy?)
December 4th, 2009 at 9:04 pm
True enough Lydia (and others)… most likely in the future I’ll easily cave in as I’m a weak weak man. Maybe it won’t be anything in this list, but it sure will be whatever that’s trendy & ‘most-wanted’ by kids of that time period. Argh.